Day Five

I've done pretty well this week. Exercised every single day. Yesterday I felt bad because I had a caramel apple. A homemade one that rang in at 9 points! Oh well. I tracked it. Today, I am starving and snack-y. I did make an excellent choice for lunch, though. I went to Chipotle's and got:

Lettuce
Pork
Tomato Salsa
No dressing

Total: 6.5 points! Can you believe that?? It's kind of plain with no dressing, but the pork is seasoned enough to not make me want to die. I could live on their tomato salsa, too. I should learn how to make it.

I am going into this so tentatively. I have such a hard time losing weight, and there's no guarantee this will do anything. I have tremendous willpower, but something is wrong with my body that I can't lose weight. I like to see myself in a year and see myself thinner and happier with myself, because if I see results, I can easily (well, not easily) stick with this. I could be a success story, if my body cooperates.

I might have popcorn for a snack later.

Day One

Yesterday was day one of my new Weight Watchers journey. I'm not going to gush all about how excited I am and how wonderful it is and how great it is to begin this next step, because to be honest, it SUCKS and is a hate crime of the highest class.

I hate dieting. Hate. It. But, I'm what they call a slow loser, fast gainer. Meaning, I can lose 1 pound a month on a diet, but when I'm not dieting, I easily gain 5 pounds a month. Since having gastric bypass (that never worked, by the way), I have the metabolism of a sloth.

I haven't been dieting for a few months now, and needless to say, I have gained A LOT of weight. So, back onto something I go.

Day one: I starved to death all day. I had a headache, a faceache, and a stomach ache. I felt sluggish and tired and dopey. I was angry for having to diet and sad at the number on my scale.

Day One, later: I tentatively take out my scale and stare at it with contempt. I don't see HOW the weigh in I had this morning can be right. If it matches what I'm about to see now, then I'll accept it.

Day One, a few seconds after that: This weigh in shows seven pounds less. Excellent! I should have only cried for 30 minutes instead of 37! Yes! But, boy do I still have my work cut out for me. I am going to cheat and not update my first weigh in so it will look like I lost a bunch the first week. Cheater! :)

Day one, evening: My stomach hurts so bad I might die. My head is going to explode and I am out of points. I did exercise, at least. Hooray for me.

Day one, night: I didn't snack even though I wanted to. I should get my cross stitch started to keep occupied. I feel sick, tired, and cranky.

That concludes day one.

Those Were The Days

Let's Play a Game

Let's play a game, you and I. Go waaaaaayyy back into your past and remember something that happened to you, you did, you saw, you thought, whatever. Think of something you did that you wouldn't dare tell your grandkids, but still sometimes brings a smile to your face when you remember it. A smile and maybe makes you blush. Go ahead and giggle a little bit and feel embarrassed in a good, titillating sort of way. Or, maybe you remember something that makes you feel slightly guilty in a hedonstic sort of way. Or makes you hope your mother never finds out.

Okay, got something in mind?

Good. Post it.

Ha! Just kidding. Kind of. I am bringing this up for a reason. Have you ever thought of something like that and it seems so long ago and so foreign that it's almost like it either happened to someone else, or you just read about it or saw it in a movie? I have lots of stories and situations that, because of my youth, and probably, well, beer, seemed like good ideas at the time. Perhaps it's places I went, people I knew, things I did, things I probably shouldn't have done, etc. A lot of these situations make me blush, to be honest. And, I'm SO FREAKIN' OLD that it almost seems like these things happened in a dream. Or on TV or in a book. I think anyone who gets to be my age, well past their youth and slightly to the left of stupidity but to the right of senility, has these things that they pull out of their memory once in a while, if nothing else, to prove that they had a different life "before".

I am thinking about a situation right now. I am embarrassed about it, yet part of me wants to giggle like a school girl, putting my hand over my mouth to prevent the tittering of a ninth grader to fly out. I can almost feel the heat and rosiness creeping up my cheeks. It seems like so long ago, because it was. But, it also seems like such a distant memory that I almost have to sit and really think if it was real. It was, but it has taken on that soft focus quality that comes with blurring with age. It still makes me feel twisty inside, though. :-)

I think the older I get, the fewer and farther between these memories will be. Mostly because I haven't created many new deliciously naughty stories, but also because I've been paroled out of that life so long that eventually most of it will slip out of my ears completely, until it's jarred back in by a catalyst.

Those were the days, my friends. Those were the days.

“Fond memory brings the light of other days around me.” Thomas More