How far is Heaven
shortly after my dad died in 2002, I went on a spiritual quest. I bought every book I could find on heaven and the afterlife. I was desperate for proof that these types of communications existed. I wanted to know that my dad was okay. He didn't even necessarily need to talk to me, I just wanted a sign he was okay. That he was happy. I honestly thought I was going need to be committed, I was so desperate for a sign. I cried incessantly for 3 weeks after he died. Mostly normal grief, sprinkled with some guilt and mixed with not knowing. Not knowing if he was okay in Heaven with his parents. Not knowing if he was with Jesus. (My blog, my beliefs). Not knowing if he knew how much I loved him. How much we all missed him. I honestly thought that I was going crazy. My thoughts ran constantly, and quickly. Like an Amtrak flying through my head. I couldn't get my arms around the fact that he was gone.
Anyway, that's when I started dreaming about him. Not dreams where he was just standing there. Dreams where I was conversing with him. I am not going to go into the details, because they're very personal to me. Things my dad told me that I could not know any other way. According to different sources, there are several kinds of after death communications. Dreams are one of them. Dreams that aren't discombobulated, like most of my dreams are. Dreams that make sense, not one of those "It was my house, but it wasn't" kinda things. Not, "In my dream last night, I was a transvestite with four foot high hair and no legs." These dreams were ones where my dad sat down with me and talked to me. In my second dream, he actually let me pinch his arm to see that he was real, and not wooden like he was in the casket.
I know this sounds crazy to some, but these were the signs I needed. In one dream, I asked him if Heaven was as good as I thought. His response was that it was beyond anything anyone on earth could imagine. I breathed a sigh of relief in these dreams and frankly, didn't want to wake up. When I did wake up, though, I didn't have a sense of sadness at it being over, but a sense of absolute joy. My dad had come to tell me that he was okay. I hesitate to type these things because they are so personal, but if there is someone out there hurting as much as I was at that very moment, if I can offer even the smallest consolation, it is worth it.
But, the most amazing thing of all happened on January 8th, 2003. I was having major surgery and had been wheeled into the room to be prepped. It was going to be very soon that I was taken into surgery and I was lying there talking to my Dad, asking him to watch out for me, and if something went drastically wrong, to greet me at the gates. I was on the extreme right hand side of the room, as you were looking at the beds, and across from me were these shelves with tons of supplies on them. All kinds of different medical thingies. I can never capture this moment completely, but I will never forget it as long as I live. I was laying there, thinking of being under anesthesia and how close to death we really are at that point. Suddenly, the supplies fell off the shelves. I wish I could make that more dramatic, but it's hard to actually type it as dramatically as it happened. They just toppled over. And these things weren't on the edge, either. They were set back on the shelves about a foot. Not teetering on the verge of falling off. I lifted my head up and saw what happened. At first I thought that one of the 10,000 people in there had knocked it off, but there was nobody even near these things. One of the nurses walked over to the supplies and said, "That's weird." and put them back on the shelf. I was watching her doing this the whole time. She no more turned around, and the stuff flew off the shelves again!!! Right before my very eyes. The nurse kind of shook her head and put them back again. She came over to check me and said, "I don't know what that was all about." I had tears just streaming down my face and I said, "That's my dad." She looked at me like I was crazy. It was the sanest I had felt since September 22, 2002.
surgery is successful, and they're rolling me to recovery. As I get driven by my husband, my mom, and my aunt, I reach out to mom and say, "Dad was in there with me." She said she knew, and I said, "No, seriously. He was IN THERE with me." I don't remember that, but they all said I looked so peaceful and almost glowing. (Corny alert!!!) But, I had some peace. He had been there. Wanna hear what he knocked off the shelf? Adult diapers. Wouldn't have it any other way, would you, Dad?
That's when I knew with absolute certainty that there is a life after this one. A heavenly life, full of joy and void of sadness. A life where my dad has his leg back and he can be with his parents. A life in a world that is so beyond anything I can imagine, my dad can only tell me that it's beyond anything I can imagine. I have thought about that world often since these dreams. Someday, dad will meet me at the gates. And, just for fun, I'm bringing adult diapers.
Anyway, that's when I started dreaming about him. Not dreams where he was just standing there. Dreams where I was conversing with him. I am not going to go into the details, because they're very personal to me. Things my dad told me that I could not know any other way. According to different sources, there are several kinds of after death communications. Dreams are one of them. Dreams that aren't discombobulated, like most of my dreams are. Dreams that make sense, not one of those "It was my house, but it wasn't" kinda things. Not, "In my dream last night, I was a transvestite with four foot high hair and no legs." These dreams were ones where my dad sat down with me and talked to me. In my second dream, he actually let me pinch his arm to see that he was real, and not wooden like he was in the casket.
I know this sounds crazy to some, but these were the signs I needed. In one dream, I asked him if Heaven was as good as I thought. His response was that it was beyond anything anyone on earth could imagine. I breathed a sigh of relief in these dreams and frankly, didn't want to wake up. When I did wake up, though, I didn't have a sense of sadness at it being over, but a sense of absolute joy. My dad had come to tell me that he was okay. I hesitate to type these things because they are so personal, but if there is someone out there hurting as much as I was at that very moment, if I can offer even the smallest consolation, it is worth it.
But, the most amazing thing of all happened on January 8th, 2003. I was having major surgery and had been wheeled into the room to be prepped. It was going to be very soon that I was taken into surgery and I was lying there talking to my Dad, asking him to watch out for me, and if something went drastically wrong, to greet me at the gates. I was on the extreme right hand side of the room, as you were looking at the beds, and across from me were these shelves with tons of supplies on them. All kinds of different medical thingies. I can never capture this moment completely, but I will never forget it as long as I live. I was laying there, thinking of being under anesthesia and how close to death we really are at that point. Suddenly, the supplies fell off the shelves. I wish I could make that more dramatic, but it's hard to actually type it as dramatically as it happened. They just toppled over. And these things weren't on the edge, either. They were set back on the shelves about a foot. Not teetering on the verge of falling off. I lifted my head up and saw what happened. At first I thought that one of the 10,000 people in there had knocked it off, but there was nobody even near these things. One of the nurses walked over to the supplies and said, "That's weird." and put them back on the shelf. I was watching her doing this the whole time. She no more turned around, and the stuff flew off the shelves again!!! Right before my very eyes. The nurse kind of shook her head and put them back again. She came over to check me and said, "I don't know what that was all about." I had tears just streaming down my face and I said, "That's my dad." She looked at me like I was crazy. It was the sanest I had felt since September 22, 2002.
surgery is successful, and they're rolling me to recovery. As I get driven by my husband, my mom, and my aunt, I reach out to mom and say, "Dad was in there with me." She said she knew, and I said, "No, seriously. He was IN THERE with me." I don't remember that, but they all said I looked so peaceful and almost glowing. (Corny alert!!!) But, I had some peace. He had been there. Wanna hear what he knocked off the shelf? Adult diapers. Wouldn't have it any other way, would you, Dad?
That's when I knew with absolute certainty that there is a life after this one. A heavenly life, full of joy and void of sadness. A life where my dad has his leg back and he can be with his parents. A life in a world that is so beyond anything I can imagine, my dad can only tell me that it's beyond anything I can imagine. I have thought about that world often since these dreams. Someday, dad will meet me at the gates. And, just for fun, I'm bringing adult diapers.
posted by Nebraska Angie @ 9:34 PM
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